Santa:Give me one room with double-bed. Hotel Manager: But Sir, you seem to be alone. Santa: Yes. But I am married and I wish to enjoy silence from the other side of the bed!
Santa hurried into a quick-lunch restaurant and said, "Give me a chicken sandwich". "Yes, sir," said the waiter, reaching for the sandwich, "Will you eat it or take it with you?" "Both," was the unexpected but obvious reply from Santa!
Santa: A friend of mine just got divorced. He and his ex-wife split the house. Banta: So sad. Which part did he get? Santa: He got the outside!
A worried Santa to the local police, "I've been getting threatening letters in the mail". That's against the law, isn't it?" "It certainly is", the Inspector replied. "Do you know who's been writing them?" "Yeah', replied Santa. "My girlfriend's husband!"