If programming languages were weapons : - C is an M1 Garand standard issue rifle

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If programming languages were weapons : - c is an m1 garand standard issue rifle, old but reliable. - c++ is a set of nunchuks. powerful and impressive when wielded but takes many years of pain to master and often you probably wish you were using something else. - perl is a molotov cocktail, it was probably useful once, but few people use it now. - java is a belt fed 240g automatic weapon where sometimes the belt has rounds, sometimes it doesn't, and when it doesn't during firing you get an nullpointerexception, the gun explodes and you die. - scala is a variant of the 240g java, except the training manual is written in an incomprehensible dialect which many suspect is just gibberish. - javascript is a sword without a hilt. - go is the custom made "if err != nil" starter pistol and after each shot you must check to make sure it actually shot. also it shoots tabs instead of blanks. - rust is a 3d printed gun. it may work some day. - bash is a cursed hammer. when wielded everything looks like a nail, especially your thumb. - python is the "v2/v3" double barrel shotgun, only one barrel will shoot at a time, and you never end up shooting the recommended one. - ruby is a ruby encrusted sword. it is usually only used because of how shiny it is. - php is a hose, you usually plug one end into a car exhaust, and the other you stick in through a window and then you sit in the car and turn the engine on. - mathematica is a low earth orbit projectile cannon, it could probably do amazing things if only anyone could actually afford one. - c# is a powerful laser rifle strapped to a donkey, when taken off the donkey the laser doesn't seem to work as well. - prolog is an ai weapon, you tell it what to do, which it does but then it also builds some terminators to go back in time and kill your mom. - lisp is a shiv which comes in many forms. anyone who uses this is probably crazy and dangerous.

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