Pappu: Usko Pane Ke Liye Main Bhagwan Se Bhi Lad Padata! Banti: Fir Jagadde Kyon Nahin? Kisne Roka Tha? Pappu: Maine Socha Ki Vakat Kharab Chal Raha Hai Bhagwan Se Panga Lena Thik Nahin!
Adhyapak: Sut N Kapas Julaahon Men Latthamalat! Is Kahaavat Men Julahon Ki Tulna Tum Kisse Kar Sakte Ho? Pappu: Ji Bhartiy Janta Parti Men "Pi Em" Pad Ke Davedaron Se!
Adhyapak: Manlo Tumhara Dost Aur Tumhari Garlfrend Ek Kashti Men Savar Hain Aur Dubne Lagte Hain Batao Tum Kise Bachaoge? Pappu: Kisi Ko Nahin Marne Do Donon Ko! Adhyapak: Kyon? Pappu: Sale Donon Ek Sath Ek Kashti Men Kar Kya Rahe The?
Pappu: Janu Ab Tum Pahle Se Badal Gai Ho! Garlfrend: Wo Kyon? Pappu: Ab Main Tumhen Kis Karta Hun To Tum Aakhe Nahin Band Karti! Garlfrend: Haramkhor Pichhali Bar Band Ki Thi To Mere Pers Se 500 Rupaye Gayab The!
Adhyapika: Ek Din Aisa Aayega Jab Prithvi Par Pani Nahin Rahega Sabhi Jiv Jantu Mar Jaayenge Aur Prithvi Tabah Ho Jayegi! Pappu: Madam Ji Us Din Tiusan Padhne Aana Hai Kya?
Santa: Yah Ladki Kaun Hai? Pappu: Papa Yah Meri Garlfrend Hai! Agale Din... Santa: Ab Yah Ladki Kaun Hai? Pappu: Rishta Vahi Item Nai!
Pappu (Sone Se Pahle) "Dadi Is Ghar Men Ham 5 Log Rahte Hain Na Papa Mama Main Didi Aur Aap?" Dadi: Teri Shadi Hogi To 6 Ho Jayenge! Pappu: Didi Ki Shadi Hogi To Fir 5 Ho Jayenge? Dadi: Tera Bachcha Hoga Fir 6 Ho Jayenge! Pappu: Aap Maroge To Fir 5 Ho Jayenge? Dadi: So Ja Haramjade!
Pappu Ko Pariksha Men 0 Nambar Mile To Santa Ne Dant Kar Pucha "Yah Kya Hai?" Pappu: Madam Ji Ke Paas 'Star' Khatam Ho Gae The To Unhonne Ab 'Planet' Dena Shuru Kar Diya Hai!
College Ki Galiyon Men Ajib Khel Hota Hai; Class Ke Bahane Dilon Ka Mel Hota Hai; Not Ki Jagah Lav Latter Exchange Hota Hai; Isiliye To Pappu Har Saal Feel Hota Hai!
Pappu: Maine Apni Garlfrend Ko Chumban Ke Liye Agrah Kiya! Tumhe Malum Hai Usne Kya Jawab Diya? Banti: Ladagar Ke Gussa Ho Gayi Kya? Pappu: Nahin Yaar Usne Kaha 'Karlo'!
Adhyapika: Agar Ek Aam Ke Ped Par 10 Kele Lage Hain Aur Unamen Se Hamne 7 Amrud Tod Liye To Kitne Angur Bache? Pappu: Madam 9 Hathi Bache Adhyapika: Vah Tumhen Kaise Pata Chala? Pappu: Madam Kyonki Main Aaj Khane Men Gobhi Ki Sabji Laya Hu Kahani Ka Naitik: Roj Brush Karo Varna Petrol Mahanga Ho Jayega!
Adhyapika: Beta Batao Ki "Shi Ij Kiding" (She Is Kidding) Ki Hindi Kya Hogi? Pappu: Itna Aasan Iski Hindi Hogi . .. ... "Vo Bachche De Rahi Hai"!