Animal Jokes

Q: what language do birds speak? a: pigeon english!

Q: what do you call a duck on drugs? a: a quackhead

Q: how do you get a parrot to talk properly? a: send him to polytechnic!

Q: did you hear about the seabird that was friends with a black cat? a: it was an albatross.

Q: where do birds invest their money? a: in the stork market!

Q: where do blind sparrows go for treatment? a: the birds eye counter!

Q: what do you get if you cross a parrot with a woodpecker? a: a bird that talks in morse code!

Q: what do you get when you cross a country singer with a bird? a: a nashville warbler.

Q: what do you get when you cross a canary and a lawnmower? a: shredded tweet.

Q: if there's 4 birds sitting on a fence and you get a gun and shoot one, how many are left? a: 0 birds are left because the rest fly away.

Q: why do seagulls live by the sea? a: because if they lived by the bay they would be a bagel.

Q: what do you call a woodpecker with no beak? a: a headbanger!