doctor: depressed because your girlfriend dumped you? take this tablet, drink a lot of water, sleep well & you'll be fine in the morning. bartender: depressed because your girlfriend dumped you? drink these shots, call her, tell her to buzz off & you'll be fine in the morning. choose wisely!
Man: doctor, my wife is moody all the time, gets angry at me for no reason and never agrees with whatever i say. what could be wrong? doctor: everything appears to be normal, so what's your question?
My dentist told me "this might hurt a little bit. are you ready?" i said, "yes, i'm ready." he said, "i'm sleeping with your wife!"
Found out all four of my sons want to be valets when they grow up. my doctor says that's the worst case of parking sons disease he has ever heard of!