I have finally realised that only way to lose weight with green tea is if you go to the mountain and pick it yourself!
Me: Why am I still single? Brain: You're weird as shit. Body: And you're fat. Face: Plus you're ugly. Food: But I'm here for you!
Just wondering why brain cells die, skin cells die, your hair follicle die, but fat cells live FOREVER?
20 years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have no cash, no hope and no jobs. Please don't let Kevin 'Bacon' die!
Person 1: I can draw really well! Person 2: I can sing really well! Me: I can eat and drink really well!