A blonde phoned police to report that thieves had been in her car. "they've stolen the dashboard, the steering wheel, the brake pedal, even the accelerator," she cried out. however, before the police investigation could start, the phone rang a second time and the same voice came over the line. "never mind, i got in the back seat by mistake."
The husband came home and caught his blonde wife reading his diary. She angrily shouted, "Who the f**k are April, May and June?"
A blonde is out walking along a river one day when she sees another blonde on the opposite bank. She shouts "Woohoo, how do I get to the other side?" The second blonde looks up and down the river and replies, "You are on the other side".
A blonde went to cash a cheque that she got from her husband. The bank cashier asked her to endorse it. So she wrote on the back, "My husband is a wonderful person"!
Did you hear about the blonde who got locked in the bathroom? She was in there so long, she peed her pants!
Blonde: I get a terrible pain in my eye whenever I drink a cup of coffee. Doctor: Try taking the spoon out.
"Mum", said the son to his ageing blonde mother, "When you go, do you want to be buried or cremated?" "I don't mind", replied the mother. "Surprise me!"