Animal Jokes

Q: where do dogs go when they lose their tails? a: to the retail store.

Q: what kind of dog tells time? a: a watch dog.

Q: what has four legs and an arm? a: a happy pit bull.

Q: why is a tree like a dog? a: because they both lose their bark when they die.

Q: did you hear about the cowboy who got himself a dachshund? a: everyone kept telling him to get a long, little doggie.

Q: did you hear about the new breed in pet shops? a: they crossed a pit bull with a collie; it bites your leg off and goes for help.

Q: how do you know if there is an elephant under the bed? a: your nose is touching the ceiling.

Q: why did the turtle cross the road? a: to get to the shell station!

Q: why did the chicken lawyer cross the road? a: to get to the car accident on the other side.

Q: why did chicken jim morrison cross the road? a: to break on through to the other side.

Q: why do hummingbirds hum? a: because they don't know the words.

Q: what did the chick say when it saw an orange in the nest? a: look at the orange mama laid