Santa is taken to court on the charge of drunken driving. The judge says, "You've been brought here for drinking." Santa: Great. Let's get started!
Banta: Why do you send all the messages to me, twice? Santa: So that you keep one and forward the other. Banta: Stupid... then you shall send it to me thrice. Santa: Why? Banta: So that I can delete one!
Doctor: Have you ever fallen asleep while driving? Santa: Not that I remember, but I have woken up driving several times!
Santa: Mere Se Aaj Buhut Galti Ho Gayi. Banta: Kya Hua? Santa: Meri Saali Do Kutte Ke Pille Lekar Aayi Thi. Maine Usse Jeeto Ke Saamne Keh Diya - Ek 'Puppy' Mujhe De Do!
"Oh love, what did you ever do to deserve a wife like me?" Jeeto said looking lovingly into her husband's eyes. Santa: I don't know, but I promise I'll never do it again!
Santa telling Pappu the spelling of 'assassination'. One ass; another ass behind; 'I' am behind it; and behind 'I' is the whole nation!